Don't mention the war!

In case you don't know, I've been teaching English to primary school kids since November this year. I have 3 classes, CE2, CM1 and CM2, those are equivalent to years 4, 5 and 6 in the UK. And for those still bemused they are 8, 9 and 10 yr olds.
 The classes are fairly small, between 8-12 pupils in each, so it could be worse I guess. This is my first time teaching kids. Ever. I think it's fairly obvious for me to state that it's not quite the same as teaching willing adults!!

Some of the pitfalls I have encountered are surprising, here's my first list of

"Things NOT to talk about with kids you teach and why"

1. Parents
It was the lest lesson before Christmas with the youngest class and to finish off I got them to design their own Christmas card ( the Educational focus being that it's a British tradition to send greeting cards at this time of year, and also they would practise writing "Merry Christmas"). When they were done, they started to hand them in to me, and in all my wisdom I said: "No, the cards are to keep and you could give them to your parents".
The conversation then went like this:
child no1
"but Miss my parents are divorced can I have more card to make another one"
Me: "pause"
child no 2, 3 and 4: "my parents are divorced too, can I have another card?"
child no 5: "my parents are getting divorced can I have another one?"
child no 6: "my parents aren't divorced but can I have another card?"
child no 7: "NO, only those with divorced parents can have more cards!"
Me: (after quite a long silent panic thinking "what have I said?") "I have enough cards for EVERYONE to do a second one, now sit down please!"



2. Christmas
I was warned that Christmas can be a tricky subject with these age groups as most of my younger class still believe in Santa, but most of the older ones don't. Of course you don't want to be the cause of any child being utterly disappointed, it's just risky in case something you say starts such a conversation. I decided to brave it and we had fun learning Christmas songs and doing Christmas themed puzzles in the last week. However I did receive one comment from one child, who said to me:
"I'm not singing We wish you a Merry Christmas, because I'm religious"
I did NOT want to take this conversation any further, as it sounded like I might step into a minefield, so I said "OK that's fine". She seemed fine about doing her Christmas wordsearch though, so I don't think I've offended her too much!



3. Pets
I got through a whole one hour lesson with my CM1 class on pets without any issues. However today with the youngest ones (CE2) I was teaching them their colours and it nearly all went wrong! I have one boy who appears to have some personal problems anyway and he's not the best behaved boy in the class, but he's bright and I like him despite his disruptiveness. Today he started the class by coughing and sneezing and blowing his nose, complaining he was too hot while wearing just a t-shirt and everyone else was freezing cold! Anyway, more than halfway through the class someone told me he was crying (which you don't have to point out, I hadn't noticed). I went to him immediately and asked what was wrong, worried that he was feeling really unwell. Through his sobs he told me his dog was dying. Now I was a bit taken aback as it's not what I was expecting him to say, I wasn't sure what to do. I'm not even sure I completely believed him, but what should I do? I considered taking him to his class teacher next door, but what if she told me it's a stunt and I shouldn't have fallen for it?
In any case I had to abandon what I had just started doing with the whole class, so quickly handed out some colouring in sheets for them to do, went back to him and gave him a tissue. Another kid asked what was wrong with him, and the conversation started to go like No1 Parents above!
Child 1: "his dog is dying"
Child 2: "What?"
Child 1 (louder): "his dog is dying"
Child 3: "my guinea pig died"
Child 4: "my cat died, he was very old"
Me to the poor boy still crying: "try not to worry about it while you're at school. School is a good distraction, focus on the class and it will take your mind off it. When you're at home you can give your dog lots of cuddles." 
 I have no idea if this is good advice, it's the first thing I thought of under pressure! It calmed him down though.
Then as the other children finished their colouring, one boy (who I unfortunately suspect may have a crush on me) handed his lovely colourful rainbow to me. I told him to stick it in his book (not nastily, literally), he said it was for me. Thinking of the pile of drawings he has already given me, I explained I wanted him to keep it in his book so he would remember the colours he had learned today. He then proceeded to tell me about how he was with his dog on the night he died...



ARRGGHHH!!!!


I should probably mention that I have not once been supervised for any of my lessons, I feel I probably should be so someone could help me out with some tips!